Unless you've been living under a rock for ten years, you'll have heard of Tinder.
You know how Tinder works. You'll be presented with an endless list of local singles. Swipe right if someone takes your fancy, swipe left if they don't.
Even moreso, you'll know exactly what Tinder is used for - finding someone to hook up with.
Well, that's the idea, anyway. However, Tinder has fallen by the wayside in recent years. There are an equal number of people on Tinder looking for a relationship as there those who just want to get laid. Distinguishing between the two can be difficult, which can lead you to a lot of dead ends and wasted time.
Fortunately, hookup culture is no longer a dirty phrase. If you just want to hook up with strangers, that's perfectly fine and acceptable. You just need to know how to present yourself and what to say to potential matches to make sure a hook up is on the cards.
So we've put together this extensive guide for you. In this article, we'll teach you how to:
Write the perfect bio
Upload the best pictures
Send the best opening lines
Get a Tinder hookup in record time
So strap yourself in, and get ready to delve into a world of hookups and casual sex without having to go through rounds of boring conversation. Here's our ultimate guide to Tinder hookups.
Using Tinder can sometimes be a double-edged sword. It's an app catered towards hookups, but you still have go to through a couple of twists and turns in order to get it. Kind of the antithesis of what the app was originally about.
But really, it's the same with any online dating app. Dates and easy sex don't just come flying at you. You have to work for them.
Now, before we get into the nitty gritty of perfecting your Tinder profile and scoring a hookup with a local hottie, there are some things you need to know about the women who use Tinder.
Yes, these babes are looking for sex and friends-with-benefits situations too, but here's the catch: They won't just come out and say it.
Chances of finding any profiles with 'I'm just here to fuck, not make friends' on Tinder? Absolutely zero. Ladies don't work that way, as much as we wish they did.
There are numerous reasons for this, the most common of one being that these people don't want to come off as needy, easy or desperate. While they might actually be any combination of these three things, no self-respecting woman out there will admit to it.
It's understandable. But then how do you know which girls just want casual fun and which ones want something more serious?
Well, there are hints dotted around on women's bios for sure. Browse through a few profiles and you'll see things like 'just came out of a long relationship and not looking for anything too serious' or 'looking for casual dating and seeing where things go.' Comments like this are Tinder code for 'I'm here for sex.'
Sure, when you're browsing women on Tinder, you only really look at their photos don't you?
Sure, but that doesn't mean women aren't checking out your Tinder profile. While there are undoubtedly plenty of women who use Tinder to find easy sex, women are a little more picky in their selection process. They don't just rely on Tinder photos and nothing else.
That's why your Tinder profile needs to say something interesting. If it doesn't give a hint of your personality then she'll just move on to some guy's who has. Even worse, leaving your profile blank is the kiss of death, so definitely avoid that.
So, what do you say in your profile? How do you woo her with words? What's the magic combination to ensure that she stays glued to your profile?
Keep it short, simple and informative. Enough to give a taste of your personality while leaving enough room for a woman to start a Tinder conversation based on the things you've mentioned. Here are some examples:
I'm Chris, from Florida and I love books, heavy metal and painting.
I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure. If that makes you laugh, I have plenty more where that came from.
Casual or long-term, it all depends on the woman. Which one are you?
Dating me ensures you'll always be the good looking one in the relationship.
Simple as that. It doesn't have to be long. Keep it below 300 characters if possible and remember that humor goes a long way. She doesn't want a wall of text because she's not gonna be that interested in you.
A lot of guys are embarassed about using Tinder so they just put things like 'just here to see what it's like.' We guarantee that these guys aren't getting any action with a bio like that.
Initial reactions are basd on your pictures. It's a sad truth and it's shallow af but there's no way around it. So, if you want to get laid with someone you need to embrace this unfortunate reality. Women will base their swipe direction based on your profile photo and there's nothing you can do about that.
This little fact gives a lot of men anxiety. What if they miss out on the hookup of a lifetime simply because they chose the wrong profile pic? What if they think their profile pic is good but other people don't? It's a mental minefield, right?
Fret not, because finding that perfect profile photo isn't as difficult as you'd imagine. There are a few simple rules to follow to ensure that you're attracting the maximum amount of people to swipe right on you.
The trick is to accentuate the things about yourself you can control.
For example, there are lots of things we can't control about ourselves. Our looks, our height, our eye color, etc. So, if you're concerned about your looks or height, the last thing you want is a profile photo highlighting the fact that you're short and ugly.
Instead, put the focus elsewhere. You can control your fashion sense, your grooming levels, your hygeine and much more. If you can draw the attention to these things, it will give the impression that you're a fully-functioning, capable adult. This in turn will have a great effect on your hookup success and your dating life in general. Highlight your attributes and play down your negatives.
Avoid filters and emojis because they're infantile and stupid. Women don't care about seeing a halo around your head because it's not gonna be there when you meet in person. Show a true representation of yourself and make sure your profile pic doesn't look like a Snapchat you'd send to your friends.
With a basic Tinder profile you're given 8 photos (12 if you use Tinder Plus) and it's important that you utilize at least five of them. The more varied your pictures, the more chance of finding someone to hook up with tonight. More pics will also help show a true representation of yourself.
Contrary to what you might believe, it's not just a matter of looking like a stud. Shirtless photos and gym selfies will only get you so far, and truthfully, girls don't really like that. Instead, you need to look like you're an interesting person who can show a woman a good time.
Even for a casual thing, women will always choose the interesting/funny guy over the vanity-ridden gym rat. And this is doubly true for dates. If you show her that you've got life experience that doesn't include lifting weights, you're already one step above the competition.
The more versatile your pictures the better. Try and include no more than one straight-faced selfie and instead opt for pictures of you socializing, or on holiday, or visiting a famous landmark. The kind of pics that can be conversation-starters from her end.
Perhaps more importantly are pictures not to feature. Here's a short list of the kind of Tinder pics that don't work:
Pics of you and your ex. No one wants to see that.
Endless selfies and nothing else. This just implies you have no friends or social life.
Shirtless posing pics. This just tells women you'e vain and need validation from strangers.
You and a friend, especially if they're better looking than you.
Pics that look like they've been pulled off Snapchat with filters, emojis or captions.
Things other than you. Sure, your dog is cute, but she's not gonna fuck you because of your dog.
In short, look like a secure adult, not a douche.
Ever seen a woman's Tinder inbox? Her messages read like this:
'How are you?'
'You're so hot.'
Repeat a million times over. Now, you probably don't need telling that women don't really like people who send messages like this. Anyone who says 'hey' right from the off isn't getting laid, guaranteed.
Even if it's for a hookup, you need to put in a bit of work. Men often feel like they only need to make contact before a horny babe will invite them into their bed, but it's never quite that easy. The pictures are the spark, and the conversation is the gasoline.
So, how do you get the conversation off to an explosive start?
The best advice we can give you is: Don't be boring. Never start your opening message with 'hey' because she gets this all the time, probably twenty times a day. Once she sees this dreaded word, she'll throw you in amongst the other mundane, personalityless users.
The second best advice we can give you is: Look through her profile to find something personal to talk about. Do you have anything in common? Did you like any thing in particular about her profile? Sure, you need to put a bit of work in, but it's a sure fire way to get a response. Look through and see if she's been to any famous landmarks like the Eiffel Tower or the Tokyo Skytree.
Once again, there are plenty of things not to say in your first message. Here's a short list:
Boring, interview-style questions. Instant swipe left.
Over-use of emojis. Emojis make you look like a child. We can't stress this neough.
Fake 'get-to-know-you' questions like 'how was your day?' Great way to get unmatched.
Huge walls of text. She wants to hook up, not read a novel.
These kind of questions don't get her in the mood for chit-chat and certainly not in the mood for impulsive sex. Avoid them at all costs.
Here are a few things to say to your match once you've connected. Avoid some of the more risque ones if she seems a little on the conservative side.
'Is it possible for your virginity to grow back?'
'I see you went to [place pictured in profile]. Why the hell did you come back?'
'You have a really nice name. Does your phone number sound as good?'
'I came here to meet a hot woman and drink Sunny Delight... and I'm all out of Sunny Delight.'
Remember that humor is the secret weapon. A recent survey reported that girls on Tinder were more likely to respond to a guy if he made her laugh.
One of the more debated facets of online dating is the use of chat up lines. In the modern day (especially in person), chat up lines are completely dead in the water. Or, the serious ones are anyway. The days of women swooning over an obviously-rehearsed sentence are long gone. Thanks a lot, Neil Strauss.
But the weird truth is that some chat up lines still work, providing they're either A) cheesey, B) funny, or C) address the irony of using chat up lines. Some good examples:
'Do you like raisins? Well, how do you feel about dates?'
'My name's the Chrome browser. Can I crash at your place tonight?'
'I’m learning about important dates in history. Wanna be one of them?'
'You must be a bank loan, because you've got my interest.'
These lines are purposely cheesey, almost like they're chat up line parodies. And for various reasons, they work, so utilize them to your advantage.
So, you're looking for something casual, right?
Good, because she probably is too, however, it's important to not go round announcing it. Yes, it's a bit of a paradox but simply putting 'only here to hookup' in your bio is a great way to get ghosted.
However, once the conversation picks up some momentum, you can start being a little more open about your intentions. Something like:
'I'm not here for anything serious, but if the right woman comes along then who knows?'
There's something very dissuading about a guy who doesn't take the time to get to know a girl. It's definitely a strange concept, since both guy and girl probably just wanna get dirty, but this whole social jig has become an intregal part of the online dating hookup process.
To clarify, 'ask her out' can mean a number of different things. Some people will legit ask her on dates, while some people might be more direct. It all depends on the individual and their confidence levels.
After some back-and-forth conversation, you should feel comfortable enough to make the second move, which is taking your chat to Whatsapp or text message. Most users are fine with this since it gets them away from the Tinder app (it probably doesn't matter to the men, but women's Tinders are a constant barrage of notifications).
So, you've got her number - what next? After talking a little more on your text platform of choice, ask her what she's got planned that night. She'll probably say something like 'not much,' and that's your time to strike.
'I can come and keep you busy if you want.'
'Someone as gorgeous as you doesn't have anyone to keep her company?'
'Me neither. How about we do nothing together?'
'If you're not doing much, how about doing me instead?'
Providing you've charmed her, there's a good chance she'll say yes. Then congratulations, you're free to go on dates, hookup, or whatever else you wanna do.
Something we can't stress enough is that you need to make sure you're respectful. All the time, every time. No exceptions.
There's a harsh truth that comes with online dating sites. Lots of people are going to swipe right on you, but just as many people are going to swipe left. You will be rejected a lot. Plenty of users will un-match you. It's all a part of the dating process.
However, lots of men don't take kindly to rejection and often voice their frustrations with the people who rejected them directly. This isn't a good approach. After all, just because she's not feeling you now, doesn't mean she won't in a few weeks time. Being abusive is a one-way ticket to Blocksville.
If she goes quiet on you, throw her a comment after one or two days. Nothing serious, just something like 'hey, you still using Tinder?' If she doesn't reply, move on and find different new friends instead. Don't blow up her phone with messages because if you weren't getting sex before, you definitely aren't getting sex after that.
There are some ad-hoc things you should know which don't fit into the other categories.
First is the usage of gifs. If you've spent any time on the internet, you'll know that people love gifs. Gifs often express our feelings better than mere words ever could, so use them to your advantage mid-conversation. It also shows that you have a little humor in you. (Gif options are built in to the Tinder app to make things easier).
Before you progress to hooking up, you might have to indulge in a little sexting. So, prepare yourself in case things get hot and heavy over text. Learn the ins and outs of good sexting and prepare a few sexy photos in advance (because you know she'll want to see them).
You can upgrade to Tinder Plus to stand out from the crowd. This gives you a boost and features your name and face on the highlighted profiles section. Tinder Plus reports am average 12% increase on right-swipes, which can be quite significant. Just make sure you're returning the swipes so that you match with as many people as possible.
Last of all, and this one should be obvious - be safe. This can mean two different things. Firstly, make sure that the person you're messaging is who they claim to be. Tinder is a hive of scammers and phishers so always be wary.
Secondly, be safe when hooking up and dating. Meet them in a public place if possible and then take the date back to yours or her place. Always use a condom because if she's hooking up with you, chances are she's hooking up with others. The rise in hookup culture has been great for our sex lives but terrible for STD control.
Obviously, Tinder isn't the only app to meet someone new. There are a number of other platforms which provide equally-simple hookup opportunities. We've listed a few of our favorites below.
Bumble follows the same match-making format as Tinder, except you only have a short window in order to send the first message. After an hour has passed, you and your new potential hookup partner can't chat with each other unless you take your convo over to Whatsapp or text mesage.
It's definitely extreme, but it really gets the conversation started in an explosive way. There's something about a time limit that really prompts people into action! It's a super smart way to avoid the old inbox rot that Tinder's popularity has bred.
Another great thing about this dating app is that it's fast becoming equally as popular as Tinder, so if you're on Tinder too you'll see a lot of the same people. That can be a blessing and a curse depending on your situation.
Imagine a Tinder where everyone is looking for instant, easy sex and nothing more. No time wasters looking for a relationship. You've just imagined Sex Hookup App.
You can swipe or you can browse freely, whichever way suits you best. SexHookupApp has users in every city in the world, all of whom are craving instant gratification. There's no beating about the bush here. SexHookupApp is for men and women who want to hookup without the hassle.
As one of the newest apps currently making waves on the scene, SexHookupApp provides the easiest way to find a no-strings hookup or make new friends with benefits without having to go through the usual dating malarky.
It's much more direct than Tinder. You don't have to worry about conversation or dating psychology here. And best of all, the only kind of relationship you'll find on Sex Hookup App is an explosive short-term one. If you're looking to meet someone new tonight, SexHookupApp will make it happen.
Before Tinder and before all those other dating apps, there was Adult Friend Finder.
Adult Friend Finder might be the oldest dating hub on the scene. It's been bringing people together and organizing dates for close to 25 years and it's still going strong.
Adult Friend Finder is what you'd get if you combined Tinder with social media. It's not just a place to swipe and scroll through potential partners, it's a place to chat and meet someone special. There are chat rooms, forums, blogs and group events all related to the online dating niche. It's a very all-encompassing community that has attracted 20 million users worldwide.
AFF isn't the best place for pure hookups since it's a classic dating site, not a hookup site. You'll certainly find someone to chat dirty with without a problem, but that someone might be looking for long term romance rather than simple pleasures.
The dating site to end all dating sites, OKCupid is a front runner for best dating site currently available outside of Tinder.
Like AFF, OKCupid has been here for the duration. It's amassed a huge user base the world over and remains the most popular classic dating site around. Why? Well, OKCupid has grown with the times. Many years ago it was a simple guy-meets-girl platform, but now it's a lively community full of people from all walks of life.
Inclusivity is a big part of OKC, so there are plenty of gays, queers, trans and genders you've never heard of roaming its hallways. In terms of hooking up, it's not quite Tinder-levels of simplicity, but there is a Tinder-inspired swipe system available for those who don't want to scroll through matches.
Finding an easy hookup through OKCupid isn't as straightforward as Tinder, but given the massive user numbers on here then you'll have no problem striking up convo with a bunch of people.
Had enough of vanilla sex? Good, us too. Luckily, Feeld is here to add a little kinky spice to your sex life.
Feeld is a new app for fetishists, kinksters and all manner of perverts to meet other perverts and share their lust for deviancy. If it exists as a fetish, then you'll find people on Feeld who dabble in it.
BDSM, spanking, whipping, restraining, cuckolding, swinging. Even the hardcore stuff like ball-busting and extreme insertion. Feeld is the seedy backdoor tavern where they all meet and talk about the gross shit they're into. Sounds like a lot of fun, doesn't it?
It definitely is, but Feeld isn't for the weak of heart. You'll need an iron stomach and balls of steel to handle some of the images on here. But hey, if that's what you're into then cool. Think of Feeld as the kinky equivalent of Tinder.
Since those pesky fetishists are often picky about who they sleep with, then you won't find a hookup in record time on Feeld. However, put in the work and you'll get one eventually.